"hey sexy mama...wanna kill all humans?"

There's this new game on my phone I am absolutely addicted to called "Plague Inc." It's the passive aggressive way to kill everyone you hate and then some!

Allow me to back up and explain that like a sane person. You name a disease and unleash it upon the world. The more people it infects, the more points you get to either make it spread faster/better, make the symptoms worse and more deadly, and/or prevent it from being cured. That's a pretty bad description, but I recommend it. 

The point is, you win when you kill all of humanity. It's disturbingly gratifying when you think about it. I think part of the appeal for me is being able to name what kills everyone. For example, here is a list of the names I've used, highest to lowest score. I lost after the first few.

sunshine
Dafuq
Icky
Love 
Rawr!
cookies
stop fart
UberNo
rawr
kindness (I was so disappointed I didn't kill everyone with this)
Noooooooo
new stuff
oh snap
shit (also wish I had won this)
sickyface
dinosaurs
rape (my friend was playing, he named it)
sarcasm
cum (the same aforementioned friend)
tired
time kill

...I have insomnia. Don't judge me.

I'm waiting for when I get to be absolutely amazing at this game so I can name the disease after myself. "Lauren has wiped out humanity."

I meant for that to sound funny, but my sense of humor doesn't always translate well in written form. That just sounded unbelievably fucking creepy. It's also made me seem like the biggest dick on the face of the planet before, but... I can't stop myself. So as a warning, if something seems like a terrible thing no human should ever say, there's a very good chance I'm being sarcastic. 

On a completely unrelated note- I have a guest spot on my lovely friend's blog you should check out if you are so inclined:

my guest blog